Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Wipe that smug look off your face

I'm linking to another article that was included in the THSC e-newsletter. The author suggests something MommaLlama and I have discussed frequently, which is that perhaps those who despise homeschooling (or any other form of moral stand) feel threatened and feel "judged". If we refuse to send our kids to public school, or to do Santa/Tooth Fairy/Easter Bunny, or if my wife chooses to cover her head in church, or if we don't allow sleepovers before we feel the children are ready to leave our home, people feel that we are criticizing them.

I often wonder what we could do better or differently. How can we accommodate others' comfort zone without compromising our own principles? Are we too aggressive, confrontational, sarcastic? Clearly we come across as snooty and self-righteous. I was once called "holier-than-thou", and that was long before I ever had a wife or children. I'm hoping I'm even holier now that the weight of the world is on my shoulders. As much as we try to appear that we are just minding our own business and making our own choices ("freedom of choice", anyone?), many people, especially those closest to us, who are sadly not that close any more, feel that we are judging and shunning and rejecting them.

We seem to have plenty of friends, but our families simply do not understand us or like us very much. We can't enjoy any type of serious discussion with them. We can't bring up children, politics, books, movies, religion, or anything remotely interesting, because our opinions are so conflicting. So we keep it pleasant and shallow, in order to please the grandparents who want everyone to be together and happy. Are we really that unbearable? Could it be that they feel uncomfortable and lash out in anger when they are forced to reconsider their own pursuit of materialism? Could it be that I am reading too much into the whole thing?

Here's the article:
Home-schoolers threaten our cultural comfort

Wouldn’t you just love to wipe that serene look right off her smug face? Is it any wonder we hate her so?

2 comments:

MommaLlama said...

I really liked this quote myself:
"We give up the bulk of our waking hours with our children, as well as the formation of their minds, philosophies, and attitudes, to strangers. We compensate by getting a boat to take them to the river, a van to carry them to Little League, a 2,800-square-foot house, an ATV, a zero-turn Cub Cadet, and a fund to finance a brand-name college education. And most significantly, we claim “our right” to pursue a career for our own "self-fulfillment.""

It was as if I wrote that myself (or Daddio)... especially listening to lifestyle of those Daddio works worth, or those of friends we aren't particularly close to do to our radically different lifestyle!

Elizabeth said...

Both of our families are very supportive of homeschooling basically because they each have their stories of kids who fell in between the cracks. The teachers told my parents that my oldest brother was not college material. He is now one of the lead field men building the new Dallas Cowboy stadium having graduated from Texas A&M. My second brother fought to get himself into AP classes in highschool but his counselor said he could not do it and made him stay at the college prep level. They diagnosed him in elementary as ADD and he was put in special education classes. He graduated a few years ago with a MASTER'S degree in architecture from Texas Tech University. And no, he did not have ADD. That man can focus for 48 hours straigt without sleep on a college project. He was a kinesthetic learner and there was no room for that kind of learning in the elementary classroom. Yes, I'm bragging, but I'm doing so because I know the heartache they went through trying to prove the school district and teachers wrong. And that does not include the stories my family has of my brothers' socialization issues. Let's just say they were beaten up numerous times for starters.