MamaLlama has to take the kids to a birthday party on Thursday afternoon... the day of the big delivery of the LG machines of happiness and wonderfulness. The question is, will they deliver them in the AM, or will I (Daddio) have to come home from work and receive them myself while mom and boys are at the party? That would be sheer agony for MamaLlama. You see, she wants to be the first one to use the new machines. The first to see them, touch them, plug them in, open the doors, experiment with the settings, and take that first wonderful load of of super soft, fluffy, fresh, warm sheets out of the new dryer. (We even have a load of wet peepee sheets waiting in the garage, courtesy of Bubba. Mom wasn't even bothered that he wet the bed, because it gave her something to WASH! What fun!)
And you just know I would not be able to resist all those buttons and blinking lights if I was left alone with them. She's afraid I'll pop the cherry on those bad boys and she'd come home to "used" appliances. How devastating...
Well, fear not my dear. I promise not to play with the new machines until you get home. I figure it's only fair, since I got to drive the new car home from the dealer for the first time. I know I get to play with everything first - camera, camcorder, DVD player, computer, DSL modem, stereo speakers, universal remote, lawn mower, cell phones, etc... I'm a dad, we love gadgets. But I understand this is your domain, so I'll keep my filthy paws off your virgin machines until you get home.
Plus it's a Mothers Day gift, so I have to give it to her in new condition. Sidebar: Reader(s), do you think that's lame, appliances for Mothers Day? I guess it's kind of a joke, don't buy your wife a vacuum for her birthday. But can I help it if that's what she actually wants? And she wants top quality, too, so there's not exactly room in the budget for diamonds this year. The way I see it, I could have gotten another el cheapo set from the scratch-n-dent outlet store, $400 total. But we got the bad-ass LGs of her dreams (okay not the very top of the line, but close to it), so that counts as a gift, right? Lest you form a bad opinion of me, she actually did get diamonds for her first Mothers Day, and well over half of the gifts I give her are frivolous girly trinkets. But the woman loves her some cleaning supplies. And kitchen tools. I know, I'm lucky.
Anyway, come Friday, all bets are off. I'm going to get my hands on those beautiful new machines, and I've already read the manual on the internet, so I know exactly what to do. I'm washing comforters and sleeping bags, ohhhh yieauh!
-Daddio
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PS - It occurs to me that if I tease her too much, we'll have a chance to see how well that sanitary cycle works on blood stains...
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
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3 comments:
Could you take the kids to the party? I'm fairly sure we are attending the same one, and Dads make great party guests too, you know. Just a thought.
I would not want an appliance for Mother's Day, but if she asked for it, then you are in the clear. I mean, she's a big girl, she would tell you if appliances didn't cut it. It might not hurt to get some flowers or something though.
Enjoy the machines. They look cool!
While it's true that I am more fun at parties, I don't think that would go over well. "Hey ladies, sorry the wife couldn't make it, she's at home with her new washing machine..."
Besides I've had my fill of Chuck E Cheese for this year. She accepted the invite, she gets to go into the lion's den.
My Dad finally started giving my Mom exactly what she wants for major holidays. He can't believe he used to blow money on fancy jewelry when all it took was buying her a new wheelbarrow to complete an outdoor project. Other practical gifts that illicited the same reaction as an actress on a "Diamonds Are Forever" commercial: A Power Washer to get the mildew off pavement, tool caddy and a $200 gift certificate from Lowe's and Home Depot. He buys fresh flowers, but he also buys her root bulbs so she can plant her own. My mother-in-law received a pair of diamond stud earrings, something she was wanting all her married life. My father-in-law got a smile and a "Thank You honey!" An hour later Dan and I gave her tickets to a Dallas Cowboy game. My father-in-law said he had expected the first reactions she gave of suprise, shock, jumping up and down and screaming at the top of her lungs. He didnt expect the crying for happiness!
Littlebit
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